The Girl Fell into Fornication and Became Ashamed to Confess

Priest Mikhail Vorobyov

Question to the priest.

I am 19 years old. I go to the church weekly, sing on the kliros and love everything connected with the church. I fell into fornication, and, the strangest or most terrible thing, I cannot leave him: he is a good person, kind, but not very religious, we are former classmates with him. Father, help! Not only that I can’t go to confession, I'm ashamed to look at icons. What should I do? I can't tell anyone about this.

The priest Mikhail Vorobyov, rector of the church in honor of the Exaltation of the Holy Life-Giving Cross of the Lord, town of Volsk, answers.

There can be found no way out of the current situation, except for sincere and deep repentance. You condemn yourself, condemn your sin, you are ashamed of your ambiguous stay in the church - this is the voice of your conscience, which is nothing but the voice of God in the human heart. The Lord calls you to repentance, to the discovery of your sin at confession, which shall be courageous, precise, ruthless towards yourself.

How to Preach about Christ without Sounding Sectarian

Questions to Archimandrite Raphael (Karelin).

Archimandrite Raphael (Karelin)

[01/29/2006] Andrey asks:

Fr. Raphael! How should an Orthodox person preach the message about Christ, the Church, etc. in the world? Where should you start so that preaching about Christ does not sound sectarian?

Is it necessary to take a special blessing from the priest for this or is it a self-evident duty of every Orthodox person?

Archimandrite Raphael answers:

Andrey! We should talk about Christian teaching to those who ask us, or, in any case, express their interest. To do this, you need to engage in constant self-education. Before such a conversation, you should pray to God in your heart and ask Him to teach you how to give an answer. You should warn that you are not speaking on behalf of the Church, but to the best of your knowledge, and if your answer does not satisfy your interlocutor, then he can turn to other, more competent people. If the conversation turns into confrontation and argument, then it is better to stop it. If you find it difficult to answer a question, then you need to say directly that you will think about it and then, at the next meeting, give an answer. I think that a special blessing is not required because the Apostle Paul writes that a Christian must give an answer of a reason of the hope that is in him. We need to beware of the sectarian practice of forcing a conversation about Christianity on people who are not inclined to do so. The most effective sermon is preaching not with words, but with the example of your life, which attracts the hearts of people. For more specific questions, you should consult with the priest to whom you confess and from whom you receive communion. God bless you.

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If You Feel Ready for Communion, It Is Better To Abstain

Archimandrite Seraphim (Krechetov)

Archimandrite Seraphim (Krechetov), spiritual father of the diocese.

I was honored to know Fr. Vsevolod Shpiller personally. He was a man with a sense of humor. When one woman told him: "Father, I always feel unready for Communion," he replied: "If you feel that you are ready, then it is better not to go." You need to prepare, but not consider yourself ready.

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What is an Assurance at the Prayer

Metropolitan Nektarios (Antonopoulos). ‘The Holy Mount which I have known a little and loved so much’

Elder Ephraim of Katounakia (1912 – 27.2.1998)

Extracts from the conversation with Elder Ephraim of Katounakia

I have told you already the story about Fathers from the Lavra coming to me with a proposal to make me the Hegumen there. I answered, “O Fathers! I will pray, and if I get an assurance, I will come to you.” But I was talking in a language not familiar to them, as they were not men of prayer.

 ‘What do you call ‘an assurance’, Gerondas?

‘I wish I could explain it to you, my child… Usually when you are going to ask God to give you a notice on some question, you address Him when in the state of grace or after the Divine Liturgy. You are praying about a problem or about a person, and the grace increases, enlightens you and makes changes so that you are clearly aware of an assurance. You are feeling that there is God’s will to fulfil that, and it will come true. However, when you feel the grace to decrease, feel sorrow, burden, you understand that there is no God’s will to fulfil what you are asking for.

When your tears gush out and you are full of calm, this is God saying to you that your prayer has been accepted, that He hears you. You see no obstacles. The more you are praying, the more tears are gushing and the greater is the sense of calm.  On the other hand, when you are praying about a person and feeling like talking to the wall, or experiencing sorrow, or you have no tears, there is nothing to be done. It is like God is telling you, “I cannot hear you. Stop praying.”

Sometimes you can hear a voice, either an inner one or an outer one. You cannot realize where the voice comes from – from the inside or from the outside. So, when the fathers from the Lavra arrived, I was praying. And I felt a great burden when going out at the Great Entrance with the Diskos and the Holy Chalice. I visited my spiritual Father, Fr Dyonisios, and he said to me, ‘What other assurance are you waiting for? If you can’t bear the burden of being the Hegumen, it’s out of question.”

I also wrote to my brother, Haralampios, seeking his advice. He answered, “Don’t agree! We, military men, are used to rule the army and can predict what the results can be. In your case I’ll tell you that you will make lots of mistakes not knowing the idiorrhythmic monasticism…” Later, Elder Paisios wrote to me not to move to Lavra. See? That’s how I got the assurance. It can come at the time of prayer or as a vision, depending of the will of God.

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Patriarch Kirill Took on Someone Else's Pain as a Child

From “The Happiest Easter of My Life.” documentary, TV Spas, 04/16/2023.

Patriarch Kirill (Gundyaev)

Patriarch Kirill:

Dad served as a priest in the Transfiguration Cathedral in the city of Leningrad. And he had a heart attack just before Easter. And the doctors demanded that he stayed at home and missed the service. But the same thing was told to my father by my relatives, my mother, and other relatives who had the opportunity to communicate with us at that time. But the father was adamant and he decided to go to the service. Of course, his performing divine service was out of the question, he simply stood in the temple, in the Altar. We were all very worried about dad. And so I decided to pray for him throughout the night service. And I prayed that the pain from daddy’s heart would transfer to my heart. You can’t imagine - I’m speaking as if confessing - like before the sacred objects, so that everyone understands that this is not a lie. My heart ached so much that I had no strength to stand at the service. But I told myself: “This is not because of your illness, it’s just that you asked the Lord for your father’s pain to pass on to you, so stand and be patient”. I endured this entire service. And when the service ended, and someone came up to dad - as I already said, he did not serve, but stood nearby - and they said: “Father Mikhail, how are you feeling?” - “I feel great.” - “So, nothing bad has happened, you didn’t feel any pain or discomfort?” - “None. The service was great.” And then I realized that the Lord had heard my childish prayer.

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On the Desire to Develop Supernatural Gifts in oneself

Question to the priest.

Hegumen Nektary (Morozov)

Why does the church not welcome the presence and development of paranormal abilities in a person (prediction, clairvoyance, etc.)?

Hegumen Nektary (Morozov), rector of the Bishops' Church of the icon of the Mother of God "Satisfy my Sorrows" answers.

Saints of the Orthodox Church performed many amazing miracles, including seeing the future, healing incurable ailments, and resurrecting the dead. But all these miracles were not the work of their hands, a manifestation of their "abilities", but were performed by the action of power, the grace of God, of which the saints were living vessels. The grace of God is not something that can be "developed" in oneself. This is a divine gift given to a person who zealously fulfils Christ's commandments, tirelessly striving to please God, to purify himself from all filthiness, from all passions. However, gifts of grace are by no means a goal, but only a consequence. Many saints of God, having been honored with the gift of miracles, prayed that the Lord would take away this gift from them, because they knew how easy it is to become haughty and fall away from God out of pride.

When a person strives to "develop abilities in himself", then it is quite obvious that he is on a dangerous path. On the dangerous, because in this case these abilities can really be given to him, but not by God (since a person has not reached the measure of saints and has not “deserved” it), but by a serpent who promised our forefathers in paradise that they would be like gods ( Gen. 3:5) and then deprived them of paradise itself.

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