Father Dimitry on how to Get Rid of Vanity

Russian Hour with Archpriest Dimitry Smirnov (October 3, 2005). Radio Radonezh.

Archpriest Dimitry Smirnov (1951 - 21.10.2020)

Listener's question:

How to get rid of vanity?

Archpriest Dimitry Smirnov in the studio:

Nothing could be simpler. For this, there is a technique developed by the ancient Fathers: first, you must get rid of talkativeness. Never initiate a conversation and answer only when asked a direct question and not beyond what is asked. That is, answer as briefly as the question itself was asked. That's the first thing.

Once you've mastered this, you need to move on to another exercise. This is something more serious: you must get to love reproach. That is, the average person is usually a rather proud creature: you can't say anything to them, you can't make a remark to them, you can't correct them—they'll immediately get offended, pout, and sometimes even quarrels break out. The usual response is, "Look who's talking!," and so on. If someone wants to get rid of vanity so seriously—like you, I feel — they need to learn to love being criticized. That is, every time someone points out our shortcomings, or judges us in some way, we need to drink these moments in our lives like nectar. Like cool water—well, not cold, icy, so as not to catch a cold, but cool on a hot day. So, with pleasure. And when you learn this, vanity will completely leave you.

Because vanity is a derivative of pride. And pride takes all such attacks, especially undeserved ones (usually deserved, but sometimes undeserved), very hard. A person is always in a state of self-justification. And when a person is humbled, humiliated, constantly shown their place, it's extremely beneficial. But still, it's precisely in this order that you need to move from one exercise to the next. If you begin with the second, then, of course, nothing will work. First, you need to teach yourself not to push forward, not to assert your "I," not to say "I'm a professor" at every turn, so to speak, but rather to be as modest as possible. The fight against vanity begins with cultivating humility. First, externally, and then it will become internal.

Source 

Even before his Death, the Elder Continued to Resist Vanity

St. Theophan the Recluse (1815 - 1894)

Apophthegmata Patrum, as translated by St. Theophan the Recluse. Ch. 11.

110. Satan appeared before one holy man, at the very hour of his death, and said to him: "You have escaped me". The elder replied: "I do not know yet".

You see to what extent the fathers were vigilant, so as not to boast of any deed.

Source

The Devil Is Most Apt and Powerful in Promoting Vanity and Haughtiness

Saint Symeon Metaphrastis. "Paraphrase of the Homilies of Saint Makarios of Egypt". III Patient Endurance and Discrimination. From Philokalia, Vol. 3.

45. He who follows the spiritual path must pay great attention to discrimination, since the ability to distinguish between good and evil, and to scrutinize and understand the various tricks through which the devil by means of plausible fantasies leads most  people astray, keeps us safe and helps us in every way. If a man wanting to test his wife’s virtue comes to her at night disguised as someone else, and she repels him, he will rejoice at this and welcome the assurance it gives. It is exactly the same with us in relation to the attacks of the evil spirits. Even if you repel the heavenly spirits, they will be gladdened by this, and will help you to participate still further in grace: because of this proof of your love for the Lord they will fill you brim-full with spiritual delight. So do not from light-mindedness speedily surrender yourself to the visitations of spirits, even if they are heavenly angels, but be wary, submitting them to the most careful scrutiny. Thus you will welcome the good and repel the evil. In this way you will increase in yourself the workings of grace, which sin, however much it may assume the appearance of the good, cannot altogether simulate. According to St Paul, Satan can even change himself into an angel of light in order to practice his deceptions (cf. 2 Cor. 11:14); yet though he may manifest himself in such a glorious manner, he cannot, as we said, produce within us the effects of grace, and so it becomes quite clear that the vision is counterfeit. For the devil cannot bring about love either for God or for one’s neighbor, or gentleness, or humility, or joy, or peace, or equilibrium in one’s thoughts, or hatred of the world, or spiritual repose, or desire for celestial things; nor can he quell passions and sensual pleasure. These things are clearly the workings of grace. For the fruits of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, and so on (cf. Gal. 5:22), while the devil is most apt and powerful in promoting vanity and haughtiness. You may know from its effect whether the intellectual light shining in your soul is from God or from Satan. Indeed, once it has developed its powers of discrimination, the distinction is immediately clear to the soul itself through intellectual perception. Just as the throat through its sense of taste distinguishes the difference between vinegar and wine, although they look alike, so the soul through its intellectual sense and energy can distinguish the gifts of the Spirit from the fantasies of the devil.

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